23.10.19

I find it so strange that I don’t have a 1000 words to write/to say (I normally do.) Obstacles are surrounding me and thoughts are processing through me but no words to type, no flow through the fingers to tap. Confused of how I am feeling, confused on the loyalty of people around me, confused on how I should be feeling and fully aware of the self care pal that I have dedicated time to build on my shoulder slowly shadowing away. (I will NOT allow this to happen)

Reading previous blogs, reminding myself a bad day is a bad day, one bad day does not mean several are about to follow. Reminding myself of the blogs I have read, the person I have become.

Telling myself: allow yourself to feel low, allow yourself to have an off day, allow yourself to process all the emotions you are feeling without beating yourself up about it. Life isn’t easy but it does not mean life cannot be kind.

Not every day, month, year will be a walk in the park and not every day, month, year will be a struggle, take day by day, month by month and year by year. Be grateful to be part of the world, to be part of the family you have around you, to be part of the friendship circle you have around you and to be the person you are.

I am aware the girl writing these blogs (moi) doesn’t have her sh** together 24/7 and doesn’t follow every bit of advice she is writing, however, she is learning and she is trying.

Putting yourself first, saying no to people who don’t deserve a yes, putting your needs first, not keeping quiet when you want to be loud and to not let unimportant problems take up so much space buzzing around. Currently I am struggling to keep these important pieces of life working, however, I am a 100% working at it.

As I’ve said the whole way through and what I keep needing to remind myself at the moment, ultimately the only person we have is ourselves. Be you, trust you, rely on you, care for YOU.

Time Out

Mind rushing, thoughts processing, heart rate racing, irrational thoughts slowing rising, bursting emotions happening. Sometimes our minds are just TOO busy, it happens to all of us. When this happens sometimes it can feel there is no escape, there is no ‘time out.’

10 things I attend to do just to have ‘time out’ on those not so quiet days/weeks just to feel numb for a second, to escape for a minute or to purely focus on me for a slight moment:

1. Read a book (no1 every time)

2. Write a blog (even if there is nothing positive to write about)

3. Listen to music (sad or happy but music YOU enjoy)

4. Eat food (comforting as most of us know)

5. Take a shower or bath (use your favourite shower gel, shampoo and conditioner, self indulge)

6. Take a walk (not always my first choice if I am 100% honest BUT it never fails to help a down day)

7. Have a nap (always a good one)

8. Colouring (so many books you can get now for de-stressing give it a go)

9. Call someone you haven’t spoken to in a while (someone who will make you smile)

10. Work (sometimes work seems like the last place we would like to be BUT it can be a great mind distraction and ‘time out’)

Human Masks

Most of us have the capability to put on a mask to hide the behind scene, sometimes we praise ourselves for this, however, should we not be wanting to share our real selves? I don’t necessarily mean share our stories, share our experiences, share our life’s with people we are not associated or who we simply don’t want to BUT I do mean share our emotions, share our day to day feelings whether that means happy, sad, excited, angry, proud or loving. Mental health has increased so much over the previous years and I believe mine partially happened due to having my pretence mask on and the pressure the mask had behind it.

Why don’t you try even just for 24 hours to show your real emotions, to show your real face, no mask, no over layer of emotions and just purely be you. You are an amazing beautiful human even if you aren’t happy every moment, let’s release the pressure of mental health and try and be open with one another. It is ok to not be ok and it is ok to be more than ok. You be YOU.