For me writing is an escape, writing is somewhere to express exactly how I feel, no one can stop me mid-flow, no one can interrupt me, just a complete blissful free zone to write about whatever the f*** I want, whenever I want. (Anyone who knows me will understand the amount I like to talk, this is supposedly helping to lessen that, what do you think?) I like to think writing has become a form of daily self care, part of my routine when needing to rant, express or voice my feelings. Anyone who has been to counselling and was well enough to stop, firstly, well done that’s great, secondly, if you feel the need for that weekly rant/talk to still happen then writing a blog is a perfect alternative or even a great addition on the side to your weekly counselling sessions. It is vital for me that I clear my head, again, if you know me you will know I have a 1000 thoughts a day running around, as I am sure a lot of us do (tiring.)
Isn’t it strange how emotions can change within a flick of a light, yesterday I had a bad day, the day before yesterday I had a good day and today I have had an average day, we are all the same. Within those three days nothing had happened, nothing was specifically wrong… puzzles me why we can’t always just be happy, would be lovely, right? (The voice on my shoulder; tough shit, we can’t so get on with what we do feel and kick ass at it.) Last week I felt the need for time alone, this week I am searching for plans to fill spaces on my calendar. (Again if you know me, you’ll know this is normal to have a full to brim diary if something isn’t right.) Does this necessarily mean I am not ok, or that I will never want time alone again? does this necessarily mean something is bothering me and I’ll never figure it? no, we don’t always know the specific problems without searching, but I know its how my body is feeling and I know it is important to listen to what my body is saying.
I have learnt it is important to listen to how you are feeling, it is important to focus on the present day and not seven days ahead and it is important to keep yourself and your well being at the top of the priority list always. YOU do you because ultimately all you have is yourself.